23 hours, 16 years
Driving fast
Reaching destination
you're happy and I am happy for you
but deep down
I am sad
1 week to say goodbye
Not wanting to leave you
23 hours, 16 years
My best friend, other half
My sister
Turning her back
4 last words in person
I love you,
Bye
23 hours, 16 years
You being there for me and with me
Every day
Every minute
Every second of my life
Now
Living life somewhere else
Engaged,
Happy
23 hour, 16 years
Gone.
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4 comments:
That was truly amazing. If I were you I honestly wouldn't change a thing. It gave me the emotion just reading it. Wonderful.
Hey blog buddy!
I like it, I think it really conveyed emotion and showed how huge saying good bye was for you. I don't want to tell you to change anything but think about making the reader feel like they were there (where did this take place? where did you go back to?)
Heya! I likeit, especially how you keep repeating "23 hours, 16 years," it felt almost like you were counting them down to the end. Th last hours was missing the 's' though.
It really gives a sense of loss. Great use of repetition. The ending really shows change. I see nothing that needs to be changed.
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